SeanOKelly.us

It is good to begin blogging again! In contrast to “potty treat” or “PICU bathroom”which I  have moved to this site in case you want to read about our adventures in the Kaiser Rosevile PICU, this post may be a bit heavy but it was what was on my mind today. Remembering that Sean and I had read “The five love languages”, my sister in law (who is one of the most thoughtful gift givers I know) gave my husband and I the book, ”The Five Love Languages of Children” co-authored by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbel . As I began reading this jumped out at me;  “ The child with an embellished sense of self worth will see himself as superior to others-as God’s gift to the world and deserving of whatever he wants”. I think we all know someone like this and if you do not maybe that person is you;)

I remember when I was teaching, the alarming rate of children who not only thought the world revolved around them (a normal developmental stage btw) but who also thought that it was owed to and belonged to them. I saw a children’s shirt the other day that said in cutesy colorful font, If I like it its mine, if you have it and I want its mine, If I had it a little while ago its mine, if I can take it from you its mine… ect, you get the idea. We may laugh but the truth is that there is a whole generation with an inflated sense of self and the mentality that they are entitled to whatever they want. Rather than understanding the value of working for what you have and giving back to others, and more importantly to God since all we have comes from him in the first place.

“Because of the privilege and authority God has given me, I give each of you this warning: Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us Romans 12:3. With this in mind I have done my best to give my children extravagant amounts of love, appropriate amounts of discipline and an accurate self worth that is not about them but about who the God that created them says they are. I do not always get this right and I’m certainly not up for any mom of the year awards but my prayer is that God will give me wisdom and enable me to do this his way. I pray that I can lead them by example allowing God to work on these areas in me as well.  “What starts off as healthy self-esteem can quickly morph into an inflated view of one’s self” Professor Jean Twenge.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’d be remiss if I did not shower my children with praise and encouragement when they deserve it. I tell them they are special and beautiful made with a plan and a purpose and that they are Gods treasure and his masterpiece. The other side of inflated self image is a crushing insecurity. A sense that we are never good enough. I have seen how destructive both ends of the spectrum can be. If we know who we are In God and allow him to be the most important person in our lives we come to know our true self worth.